I will probably delete this post later but I felt the need to speak from my heart.
I am not sure if anyone noticed but I was absent for almost the whole week. I didn’t mean to do it and I had no actual reason. My boyfriend had to be away this week because he had some business with his parents. He’d been away before and it was hard for me but this time I was just devestated. I don’t know if it has to do with my growing feelings but I was so worried about him and my mind was always with him and I didn’t feel like doing anything. I couldn’t read, I couldn’t write, I didn’t want to go out, I didn’t want to eat and I couldn’t sleep. I was just missing him.
I had no idea that you could miss someone that much and it’s the first time that this happened and I swear that I don’t want to feel that way, ever again. I hate the fact that I was a mess because of a man and I hate that I love him so much, to the point that I can’t be without him. It’s so annoying but for some stupid reason I am so gratefull that I got to experience this. I think I am so lucky to have a man like him in my life.
I think feeling so bad is something I need to work on. I can’t keep doing to myself because obviously this won’t be the last time he will have to be away for any reason.
I am sorry for letting my feelings to get in the way and preventing me from doing something I also love. I promise to all of you that this won’t happen again and I’ll be a better person. I’ll work on my worries and my patience and I won’t allow anyone to stop me from living.
I am also sorry you had to read this.